Last Monday I drove two hours down to Fort Myers for Camryn's annual neurology appointment. Living in Port Charlotte since Cam was diagnosed, we picked a neurologist closer to our home than All Childrens and I have to say that I LOVE this woman! Dr. Morales has been seeing Cam for the past three years and she has been such a wonderful doctor.BUT, although I adore her, I do not want to have to drive two hours south everytime we need to get a refill or re-evaluation, so we will definitely be finding a doctor in St. Pete. But we needed to be seen so that Camryn's medicine could be refilled, and believe me we and all of Cams classmates want her medicine refilled, so Cams and I headed south early Monday morning. I always approach these appointments with mixed emotions. I am hopeful that the Dr. will say there is a new drug on the market that will take away all of Camryns issues and I am also scared to death to say that she will say there is nothing more they can do.
Driving that far gives me a lot of time to think. Even though Camryn is with me, the car is silent, as Camryn rarely talks in the car if it is just us. I love long drives for this very reason, for as a mom, extended periods of silence are few and far between. The ride down, I went over all the things I wanted to discuss, mainly the fact that despite being on a medication prescribed solely to curb aggressive behavior in Autistic children, Camryn continues to be aggressive at school and home. Four out of five days we get a note home from her teacher saying she has scratched her classmates and made them bleed and could we please cut her nails. Ummmm, I cut her nails ALL the time, but as you can imagine, if a sixty seven pound seven year old does not want her nails cut, and Brad isn't home to hold her down, then chances are it's not going to be the smoothest of manicures. Every day there are stories from Mason of Camryn grabbing kids next to her at car circle or pinching the patrol helping her to the car. And then of course there are the multiple incidents at home where Natalie is most often the target. And Riley, we cannot forget poor, poor Ry-Ry. I know that dog thinks to herself "Rescued my a**! I would have been better off at the shelter!" But don't worry, she gets LOTS of treats and belly rubs to make up for it!
So, of course, my main reason for this visit is to see if in the last year some miracle drug has come out on the market with promises of taking away all aggressive behaviors. Oh please!!! We walk into the office and as always I am immediately reminded that our problems are so little compared to what could be. A pediatric neurology office will always will do that. The Dr. calls us back and we head to the scale. Dr. Morales does not have a nurse. She does everything herself, weigh in, height, blood pressure,etc. And because Camryn is on medication that alters her blood pressure, it is extremely important that her weight and vitals are precise so that the correct dosage can be prescribed. I know this, and the Dr. knows this, but Cams? All she knows is she does not like to get up on the scale without holding on. She has major balance issues and even though it is just a few inches off the floor, doesn't matter, she doesn't like it.To get her exact weight, she must stand on the scale with her hands to her side for at least five seconds, which may have well been five hours becasue the girl was not going to do it! The Dr. is very understanding of kids like Cam, but she is also very stern and expects no less from them than a "typical" kid, so she was instructing Camryn over and over to put her hands to her side. Meanwhile Cams was trying to hold on for dear life, whining and looking very confused. "She doesn't like to be up on anything without holding on" I kept telling the Dr. " I know, but she needs to do this. Now Camryn put your arms down." Who would think weighing your kid could be such an ordeal? Several, and I mean several minutes later, the doctor took her best read and then we moved on to height. Ugggh! Again, Camryn didn't understand and she does not like to be touched on her head, so trying to get her to stand directly up against the wall with the measuring instrument flat against her scalp was not an easy task,but we did it. Height and weight on the chart, next was blood pressure. This is the most important of all the stats for her medication and to get an accurate number Camryn must sit COMPLETELY still for a whole minute! HA! And get this, to get her blood pressure taken, the Dr. sat her in a swivel chair! A swivel chair! What?? Well, if you know Cams or any Autistic child for that matter then you know how they adore a good spin! So of course Camryn immediately put her feet to the floor and pushed off for a whirl around the office. Dr. Morales was saying "Camryn, stay still!" and although I tried to keep quiet, I finally just said "Well, a swivel chair probably wasn't the best thing to put her in if you want her to stay still." The doctor gave me a high five and laughed at her poor choice of seating. Finally, I was able to distract Camryn long enough to get a good blood pressure reading. It was fine, mine however was through the roof I'm sure. Whew! Vitals are done, moving on to the exam room.
For some reason, Cams loves a good exam table with a crisp sheet of white paper draped over it. She climps up on them like she's mounting a horse and then lays down and says "Take your temperature sweetie". The paper gets torn to shreds in the process, but Cam is in one place, so who cares?
The doctor sits down with me and I tell her my frustrations with Cams aggressions. I tell her how I don't think the medicine is working and that if it is, I can't imagine how aggressive she would be if she weren't on it. I tell her how we get notes home all the time. I start to cry, as I usually do at these appointments and I tell her how I can't go anywhere with Camryn where there will be other kids because I am so fearful she will hurt someone and that she scratches and pinches her sisters to pieces and that it breaks my heart. Dr. Morales is so kind and she took my hand and said "I know honey". "I can handle her not talking normal. I can handle her throwing fits. I can handle that she will live with us for the rest of her life. But I cannot handle not being able to go places that other moms go without a care."
The doctor looked at me with sad eyes and told me that unfortunately the aggression would get worse as she got closer to puberty and that we needed to find a medication that curbed it before it got to that point. She also told me medicine was just part of the solution, that Camryn should be receiving at least 20 hours of ABA therapy a week to really get her behavior in check. Wow. ABA is an intense one on one therapy that is supposedly very successful with Autistic children. It is also very expensive and usually not covered by insurance. I have known about it for years, but because of the expense and the intensity of it, I have never gone that route. I asked her about diet and metronome therapy, both of which she didn't seem to think would work with Cam. I value her opinion,but as far as trying the the diet and metronome therapy, I'm still going to try them. I have heard too many positive things not to.
After discussing her medication, it was time for the physical exam. Keep in mind that Camryn does not like to be touched. Brad and I have noticed Camryns right shoulder protruding more than the left. I asked the doctor to take a look and as she went to lift Cams shirt, Cam pinched her. Wrong thing to do. The doctor, who is of a bigger build, looked Camryn straight in the eye and said "No Camryn! No pinching! Unacceptable!!" Camryn's lip curled up and I thought I would die. She knew she had done something wrong, but the doctor was lightly touching her bare skin and she didn't like it and because she can't say "Hey doc, would you mind not doing that?" she did the next best thing and pinched her.
The doctor proceeded to take off Cams shirt and Cam pinched her again. Why oh why Cam? "No pinching Camryn!!If you pinch me again I am going to pinch you back!" Again Cams lip curled up and her eyes were wide as saucers. One last time Dr Morales tried to lift Cams shirt and well, she pinched her again. This time, the doctor said "That's it! You are in time out for five minutes!" and took Cam by the hand, led her to the corner, put her nose towards the wall and stood back to back with Cam. The room was silent and very awkward. It broke my heart to see my little girl be reprimanded so harshly by someone else, but I also knew that Camryn knew better and that she could not behave like that. When the doctor let her out of the corner, Camryn walked over to her and as if in slow motion leaned forward and kissed the doctors nose. It was so stinkin' cute! Dr Morales looked at me and said "Does this kid know how to work it or what?"
She finally got to look at Cams back and agreed that there could be an issue. She ordered a spinal study to determine if there was curvature. We then talked about how Camryn has always had a "look" about her, ever since she was a baby and that in several of her pictures she almost looks as if she had Down's syndrome. It is something that Brad and I have discussed several times, but I never said anything about to ther doctors. But today I thought I would put it all out there, so I asked the Dr. if it was possible that Camryn could have what is called "Mosaic Down Syndrome", which is a very mild form of Down's. I had heard about it years ago and kept it in the back of my mind. She nodded and said that she had always thought Camryn had a "look" about her as well and that even though Cam had been through genetic testing when she was a toddler that they now have better, more precise testing that can detect things the old tests couldnt. She wrote out a script for a test I cannot prounounce let alone spell, with a warning that insurance was probably not going to want to pay for it without a fight. Efff-ing insurance!!
And then, the last thing on the agenda, was my question of all questions.....What do we do when it comes time for menstruation. I apologize if this is too much info. but you know I like to keep it real. I worry about it all the time because if you think changing a seven year old's poopy pullup is bad, well.....yeah.
The doctor told me that they put kids like Camryn on the birth control pill when that happens, which is what I figured. Another medicine! I hate that! Hopefully we still have a while before that happens....please God!!
We finished up the appointment and left with four scripts...one for a new medication for aggression, one for a spinal study, one for genetic testing and one for ABA. I really should have asked for one for Valium...for me!
Cams and I climbed into the car and started our journey back home. Again, the ride would be quiet which again, gave me plenty of time to think. Driving down I cherished the silence and chance to run through all the things the doctor might say. "There is a new drug out that takes away all aggressive behaviors! There is also a new drug out that will make her be able to have a normal conversation! And there is a new drug that will take away her Autism!"
But the doctor didn't say any of those things. And who knows what I would do if she did. I looked back at Cams, sitting in her seat, deep blue eyes staring out the window and I thought about how much I loved her. I merged onto 75 and turned on radio. Sometimes silence is over-rated.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Friday, September 10, 2010
Both Ends of the Candle
Every day I get on this computer and write about raising an Autistic child. The in's and out, trials and triumphs. I do it to vent, I do it to educate and I do it because I love to write. But I am not only a mother to an Autistic child, but to two other neuro-typical children as well, or without being politically correct, normal kids and co-exisiting in these two worlds can sometimes be a real challenge
Anytime there is more than one child in a household there are bound to be times when one feels neglected or jealous,it's normal. But when children grow up with a sibling of special needs, the scales are almost always tipped unintentionally in favor of the child who needs more help.
Mason was an only child for almost two years. The first and only grandchild on my side of the family, she was perched high above the rest of the world on a golden pedastal. She was beautiful, intelligent, and totally gifted, I mean come on, aren't all firstborns? To ask my parents there had never been a smarter, sweeter more adorable baby born, ever! And of course she had Brad and I wrapped so tight around that pinky I'm surprised it didn't cut off circulation. For two years, the world revolved around her.But of course she remembers none of it.Why is it that when we are the cutest and most adored in our lives we are unable to have any recollection of it?
When Cams was born, of course the attention shifted to the new baby, but Mason rolled right along with it, never showing any resentment or jealousy toward her sister.
As time went on and it became evident that Camryn had some issues, more and more of my time was taken up with doctors visits and therapy appointments. Mason never suffered believe me, my family was more than happy to watch her, but a pattern started that continues to this day and it makes me feel so guilty.
Because of Camryns Autism, many of the activities that toddlers enjoy were not on Cam's to-do list. She didn't sit through movies, didn't play nicely with others and for a long while, going out to eat with her just didn't happen. However Mason was a typical little girl who begged to see every animated film advertised and loved to run free at the playground. Because of Brads work schedule, I was often alone with the two kids all day. I had Mason attending Pre-K twice a week when she was 2 and then five days at 3 and up, but still she got bored at home with a sister who didn't interact with her as she wanted. My family and Anna, who lived very close by at the time, was so good about helping with Mason. They would take her to the movies, to the circus, out to eat, to festivals and I would stay home with Camryn. I was so happy that she was able to experience those things and spend time with the people who loved her so much, but I was also very jealous of them for getting to share those times with my daughter when it should be me. Mason will be ten years old this February and I have been to the movies with her maybe five times, five times! She has seen every movie that has come to the big screen for kids, but that was courtesy of my brother. He is very good about spending time with the kids and going to the movies is their thing. He even takes Nat along too, which again, I so appreciate, but still feel sad that I am not there. Chuck E.Cheese, every kid goes there right? It's like the law or something, if you're a kid you have to go to Chuck E. Cheese at least once. Mason and Nat have been there a bazillion times. I have been with them once. Camryn doesn't do Chuck E Cheese. Before we moved back to St. Pete, my mom would take Mace to the Santa Clause parade downtown every year. I have been twice. Another thing Cams doesn't do is parades. I am not trying to sound like a whiner though I probably am, just a kind of "venting" session to say that I feel guilty about not being there with my other two girls for experiences that I feel a mom should share in. I am so thankful and know how blessed I am to have such an involved family and that is something I have always acknowledged. But Mason has told me on more than one occasion she wished I could come to these things.
I plan special days with her. We go out shopping for something she likes or get a bite to eat. The times are few and far between but I always try and let her know how much they mean to me and how much I enjoy her company. She has grown into such a responsible, young lady and a very cool kid. Having Cams for her sister has presented so many challenges in her life, but has also given her a perspective of the world I just don't think she would have had she not been forced to look through the eyes of a sister of the spectrum. She is extremely caring, generous and very emapthetic to her peers. She is non-judgemental and openminded and has an amazing sense of humor. She has become Camryn's protector at school, looking out for her and keeping her amused and out of trouble at car circle. It's a huge responsibility and I have told her more than once that she does not have to watch Cams at school, there are teachers for that. But she wants to do it. "No Mom, I can handle it" she said. And she can, I watch her from the car line and she is keeping a close eye on her sister, doing whatever she needs to do to keep her occupied and happy. There have been several incidences already where Cams has "assaulted" a child sitting near her and Mason takes the appropriate action, whether it be scolding Cams or taking something away from her. The principal has told me on more than one occasion that Mason is an amazing girl and a wonderful big sister. It makes me so incredibly proud of her.
I know that having Cam for a sister cannot be easy. The screaming is sometimes so loud you'd swear your ears were bleeding. The constant scratching and hairpulling. Cleaning your room only to have hurricane Cams come through. Having to decline invitations to certain events or leaving early because it's not working for Camryn. It's rough and my heart breaks for Mace and Nat every time I see them fall on the sword for their sister.But I know in my heart that two incredible women are being molded and shaped by the very sister who often brings them to tears. I cannot wait to see what strong, good hearted people they will grow into and how they will change the world.
Anytime there is more than one child in a household there are bound to be times when one feels neglected or jealous,it's normal. But when children grow up with a sibling of special needs, the scales are almost always tipped unintentionally in favor of the child who needs more help.
Mason was an only child for almost two years. The first and only grandchild on my side of the family, she was perched high above the rest of the world on a golden pedastal. She was beautiful, intelligent, and totally gifted, I mean come on, aren't all firstborns? To ask my parents there had never been a smarter, sweeter more adorable baby born, ever! And of course she had Brad and I wrapped so tight around that pinky I'm surprised it didn't cut off circulation. For two years, the world revolved around her.But of course she remembers none of it.Why is it that when we are the cutest and most adored in our lives we are unable to have any recollection of it?
When Cams was born, of course the attention shifted to the new baby, but Mason rolled right along with it, never showing any resentment or jealousy toward her sister.
As time went on and it became evident that Camryn had some issues, more and more of my time was taken up with doctors visits and therapy appointments. Mason never suffered believe me, my family was more than happy to watch her, but a pattern started that continues to this day and it makes me feel so guilty.
Because of Camryns Autism, many of the activities that toddlers enjoy were not on Cam's to-do list. She didn't sit through movies, didn't play nicely with others and for a long while, going out to eat with her just didn't happen. However Mason was a typical little girl who begged to see every animated film advertised and loved to run free at the playground. Because of Brads work schedule, I was often alone with the two kids all day. I had Mason attending Pre-K twice a week when she was 2 and then five days at 3 and up, but still she got bored at home with a sister who didn't interact with her as she wanted. My family and Anna, who lived very close by at the time, was so good about helping with Mason. They would take her to the movies, to the circus, out to eat, to festivals and I would stay home with Camryn. I was so happy that she was able to experience those things and spend time with the people who loved her so much, but I was also very jealous of them for getting to share those times with my daughter when it should be me. Mason will be ten years old this February and I have been to the movies with her maybe five times, five times! She has seen every movie that has come to the big screen for kids, but that was courtesy of my brother. He is very good about spending time with the kids and going to the movies is their thing. He even takes Nat along too, which again, I so appreciate, but still feel sad that I am not there. Chuck E.Cheese, every kid goes there right? It's like the law or something, if you're a kid you have to go to Chuck E. Cheese at least once. Mason and Nat have been there a bazillion times. I have been with them once. Camryn doesn't do Chuck E Cheese. Before we moved back to St. Pete, my mom would take Mace to the Santa Clause parade downtown every year. I have been twice. Another thing Cams doesn't do is parades. I am not trying to sound like a whiner though I probably am, just a kind of "venting" session to say that I feel guilty about not being there with my other two girls for experiences that I feel a mom should share in. I am so thankful and know how blessed I am to have such an involved family and that is something I have always acknowledged. But Mason has told me on more than one occasion she wished I could come to these things.
I plan special days with her. We go out shopping for something she likes or get a bite to eat. The times are few and far between but I always try and let her know how much they mean to me and how much I enjoy her company. She has grown into such a responsible, young lady and a very cool kid. Having Cams for her sister has presented so many challenges in her life, but has also given her a perspective of the world I just don't think she would have had she not been forced to look through the eyes of a sister of the spectrum. She is extremely caring, generous and very emapthetic to her peers. She is non-judgemental and openminded and has an amazing sense of humor. She has become Camryn's protector at school, looking out for her and keeping her amused and out of trouble at car circle. It's a huge responsibility and I have told her more than once that she does not have to watch Cams at school, there are teachers for that. But she wants to do it. "No Mom, I can handle it" she said. And she can, I watch her from the car line and she is keeping a close eye on her sister, doing whatever she needs to do to keep her occupied and happy. There have been several incidences already where Cams has "assaulted" a child sitting near her and Mason takes the appropriate action, whether it be scolding Cams or taking something away from her. The principal has told me on more than one occasion that Mason is an amazing girl and a wonderful big sister. It makes me so incredibly proud of her.
I know that having Cam for a sister cannot be easy. The screaming is sometimes so loud you'd swear your ears were bleeding. The constant scratching and hairpulling. Cleaning your room only to have hurricane Cams come through. Having to decline invitations to certain events or leaving early because it's not working for Camryn. It's rough and my heart breaks for Mace and Nat every time I see them fall on the sword for their sister.But I know in my heart that two incredible women are being molded and shaped by the very sister who often brings them to tears. I cannot wait to see what strong, good hearted people they will grow into and how they will change the world.
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
A Literal Labor Day
Happy Belated Labor Day! A three day farewell to summer filled with barbecues, pool parties,and poop, don't forget the poop. Well, I don't know about the rest of you, but here at the Walker house, while other families are choosing to sleep past their normal weekday wakeup time before lazily starting their day, we are up with the sun, cleaning ground in poop off wood floors and toilet seats, while Cam sits in a bathtub of murky water, oblivious to the fact that little flakes of feces are floating all around her.Yes my friends,that is how we kick off Labor Day weekend around here.
Of course, Brad and I had other plans for Saturday morning, first one being trying really, really hard to sleep in. Nothing extravagant, maybe 7:30, do we dare dream of 8:00? Then maybe out to breakfast or at least breakfast brought in with the kids. Something a little extra special to kick off the holiday weekend.
Now when I say sleep in, I mean stay in bed, because Camryn does not sleep in....ever. She gets up around 7:00, opens her door, stands at the babygate, talks about Ry-ry,and yells out "I need help!" so we will open her gate. This is when Brad and I assume our literal undercover positions and stay completely silent, as even the slightest sound will elicit a scream from Camryn that she wants out. We breathe only when absolutely necessary and after a tense five minutes or so, we hear Cams feet pounding back to her bed, which means she will lay there and talk to herself for another 30 minutes or so, and we will definitely take it! But this year Cams mistook Labor Day for it's literal interpretation and decided to put us to work right away, you know get the party started early. I heard her say "Poop" about 6:55 a.m., and I knew when Cam says poop, it usually means there is some in the near vicinity. Against my better judgement, I chose to ignore it. At about ten after seven, Natalie comes running into our room and delivers a message that Camryn has pooped all over her room. "It's everywhere! I saw it!" she exclaimed. I pulled the covers off from over my head and one sniff confirmed Natalies story, poop was in the air.
Brad was first to arrive "on the scene". "Awwww %&*#!" Oh this was going to be bad. Four letter words don't float freely around our house. In fact, we try really hard to filter what we say, even banning the words"stupid" and "shut up". But on occasion, this being one of them, try as we might one escapes and goes directly from our lips to Cam's brain, where it is stored in a little section labeled "Words to Shout Out in Church."
I heard the gate click open and Cams feet pounding through the house. Brad was yelling "Nooooo" as she proceeded to leave a trail of poopy footprints in her path. He managed to grab her, but not without getting his hands dirty and wrangled her into the tub. By this point I was up making my way to survey the damage. Wow, I've seen a lot of poop in my nine and a half years of motherhood. Poop in diapers, poop on cribs and poop used as body paint. But when a seven and half year old child has a bowel movement on their floor and then steps in it, smears it, wipes it... there are no words. Toys and books that happened to be in her path were now smudged with poo. And I don't know about you, but if something gets poop on it, unless it's like a family heirloom, I am not trying to salvage it. I don't care how cute it was or how much fun they had with it. No, if it's been pooped on consider it gone. So while Brad is trying to scrub Camryn down, I get out the old mop and bucket and start bleaching the heck out of the floor. Meanwhile Nat and Mace have been confined to their room,and are sitting on their beds watching the whole ordeal. Oh the childhood memories they will have! I can hear Brad telling Camryn to sit down and Camryn is fussing, yelling "Let me get the poop off honey!" I love my husband. I finish Cams room and follow the trail of poop prints to the bathroom, where I am then greeted with a toilet seat covered in nearly dried pasty poop. Apparently Camryn tried to use the toilet after the fact. It is only 7:30 by this time and Brad and I are operating on a very empty stomach, which can be good and bad. I really could have used some coffee though. Brad gets Cam out of the bath and I wipe down the last of the affected areas. It is now 8:00 a.m. Saturday morning, the first day of our holiday weekend and we had already anti-bacterialed, hand sanitized, and deodorized every inch of the house and ourselves. Cam was oblivious,sitting on the couch with a Tootsie pop watching Oobi. When Mom and Dad wake up like this, a nutritious breakfast is probably not going to happen, which is fine with the kids. I had been dreaming about a nice fluffy omelet or hot stack of pancakes, but after that mess I opted to wait for lunch. I looked at Brad, sipping his coffee and told him I was going back to bed. I shut my door, closed the blinds and crawled back under the covers. What else would you expect me to do? I was pooped! ;)
Of course, Brad and I had other plans for Saturday morning, first one being trying really, really hard to sleep in. Nothing extravagant, maybe 7:30, do we dare dream of 8:00? Then maybe out to breakfast or at least breakfast brought in with the kids. Something a little extra special to kick off the holiday weekend.
Now when I say sleep in, I mean stay in bed, because Camryn does not sleep in....ever. She gets up around 7:00, opens her door, stands at the babygate, talks about Ry-ry,and yells out "I need help!" so we will open her gate. This is when Brad and I assume our literal undercover positions and stay completely silent, as even the slightest sound will elicit a scream from Camryn that she wants out. We breathe only when absolutely necessary and after a tense five minutes or so, we hear Cams feet pounding back to her bed, which means she will lay there and talk to herself for another 30 minutes or so, and we will definitely take it! But this year Cams mistook Labor Day for it's literal interpretation and decided to put us to work right away, you know get the party started early. I heard her say "Poop" about 6:55 a.m., and I knew when Cam says poop, it usually means there is some in the near vicinity. Against my better judgement, I chose to ignore it. At about ten after seven, Natalie comes running into our room and delivers a message that Camryn has pooped all over her room. "It's everywhere! I saw it!" she exclaimed. I pulled the covers off from over my head and one sniff confirmed Natalies story, poop was in the air.
Brad was first to arrive "on the scene". "Awwww %&*#!" Oh this was going to be bad. Four letter words don't float freely around our house. In fact, we try really hard to filter what we say, even banning the words"stupid" and "shut up". But on occasion, this being one of them, try as we might one escapes and goes directly from our lips to Cam's brain, where it is stored in a little section labeled "Words to Shout Out in Church."
I heard the gate click open and Cams feet pounding through the house. Brad was yelling "Nooooo" as she proceeded to leave a trail of poopy footprints in her path. He managed to grab her, but not without getting his hands dirty and wrangled her into the tub. By this point I was up making my way to survey the damage. Wow, I've seen a lot of poop in my nine and a half years of motherhood. Poop in diapers, poop on cribs and poop used as body paint. But when a seven and half year old child has a bowel movement on their floor and then steps in it, smears it, wipes it... there are no words. Toys and books that happened to be in her path were now smudged with poo. And I don't know about you, but if something gets poop on it, unless it's like a family heirloom, I am not trying to salvage it. I don't care how cute it was or how much fun they had with it. No, if it's been pooped on consider it gone. So while Brad is trying to scrub Camryn down, I get out the old mop and bucket and start bleaching the heck out of the floor. Meanwhile Nat and Mace have been confined to their room,and are sitting on their beds watching the whole ordeal. Oh the childhood memories they will have! I can hear Brad telling Camryn to sit down and Camryn is fussing, yelling "Let me get the poop off honey!" I love my husband. I finish Cams room and follow the trail of poop prints to the bathroom, where I am then greeted with a toilet seat covered in nearly dried pasty poop. Apparently Camryn tried to use the toilet after the fact. It is only 7:30 by this time and Brad and I are operating on a very empty stomach, which can be good and bad. I really could have used some coffee though. Brad gets Cam out of the bath and I wipe down the last of the affected areas. It is now 8:00 a.m. Saturday morning, the first day of our holiday weekend and we had already anti-bacterialed, hand sanitized, and deodorized every inch of the house and ourselves. Cam was oblivious,sitting on the couch with a Tootsie pop watching Oobi. When Mom and Dad wake up like this, a nutritious breakfast is probably not going to happen, which is fine with the kids. I had been dreaming about a nice fluffy omelet or hot stack of pancakes, but after that mess I opted to wait for lunch. I looked at Brad, sipping his coffee and told him I was going back to bed. I shut my door, closed the blinds and crawled back under the covers. What else would you expect me to do? I was pooped! ;)
Friday, September 3, 2010
34 and Still Getting in Trouble at School!
I forgot to pick my kids up at school this Wednesday. Forgot to pick up my kids! Now, in my defense it was an early release day, which happens every Wednesday in Pinellas county and we did not have such silliness in Charlotte county schools, so I am still not used to it, The regular dismissal is 2:50, but on Wednesdays it is 1:35 allowing teachers extra time to plan during the week. The first week of school, they went all out making sure the parents knew to pick their kids up early, sending home flyers, automated phone calls the night before and a clear message about early release on the school marquis. So despite my scattered brain I got it, I picked them up early. This week however, only week 2 I should mention, no phone calls, no flyers. Nothing. And because I'm still getting used to this new schedule plus the fact that I have a tendency to be a bit unorganized, it completely slipped right off my mind that I needed to pick my daughters up at school an hour and fifteen minutes earlier that day.
I usually leave my house at 2:30 to get in the line. We live so close to the school it takes me no time at all to get there. This past week has been a rough one for various reasons, and I was feeling so rundown. Not wanting to be sick for the holiday weekend, I decided to take a nap before I got the girls. I bribed Natalie with a quarter to lay down with me and set my alarm for 2:20, giving me ten minutes to come out of my nap fog before I left for pickup. I left my phone on, but turned the ringer to beep/vibrate so it wouldn't wake Natalie. I of course would hear it, right? Well, no, apparently not. So I close my eyes at 1:30 and before I know it the alarm is screeching me awake. Wow time flies when you're napping! I was just getting ready to make some coffee when my phone beeped. It was the school. "Hello Mrs. Walker? This is Sawgrass Elementary, I called you a few minutes ago too. We still have your two daughters here." So I look at the stove clock which says 2:24 and say" Okaaaayyy, umm.." "It's early release day, did you forget?" "Oh my gosh!!! Oh my gosh! Yes, I totally forgot! I am soooo sorry!" I kept apologizing and "OMG"ing. " No problem, but your girls are a little upset, you want to talk to them?" Okay, so now as if I don't feel like a big enough loser, my daughter's in the front office of her new school thinking I have been in some horrible car accident or hopped a boat to Bermuda like I've threatened on numerous occasions. Mason is a worrywart by nature and she comes by it naturally,her nerves of jelly passed on courtesy of yours truly. So I could only imagine how many times she had twisted her shoelace around her fingers or how many hours of therapy were going to be needed after this incident. I told her how sorry I was and that I was on my way. Now the secretary had told me my "daughters" were upset. I knew Mason was and would expect nothing less, but Cams? I highly doubted it. I asked Mason if her sister was alright. "Oh yeah, she's fine. She did pinch a little Pre-K student, but she's just sitting here now." I knew it. The beauty of Cams's mind is that worry rarely finds it's way in. For all Cams knew, she and Mace were on a field trip to the office. She has no concept of time, only that there is never enough of it when it comes to the merry go round. And the fact that she doesn't know to worry like Mason is such a blessing for so many reasons, but in this particular situation such a blessing for Mace because I can only imagine the monstrocities the two of them could have conjured up about why I was late and what could have happened to me. And in a situation where the normal procedure would be for big sister to calm little sister, in these circumstances it was quite the opposite, with little Cams keeping Mason from hyperventilating about my tardiness.
As I pulled into the car circle, the principal walked the girls to my car. The principal! I was so embarrassed. I laughed it off and asked if this was where I was to pick up my Mother of the Year award? She laguhed and said not to worry, I was one of about ten other parents who had forgotten. I felt a slight bit better,until Mason chimed in with "Ten parents out of like 500 mom!" Ohhhhh, yeah, then I really am pathetic.
I made it up to them with cookie dough shakes from Steak and Shake and 6 times over "Thrill Hill" (only a St. Pete native knows what I'm talking about here).
Mason told me how the whole thing went down, how every car that pulled in she thought was me, how Cams pinched a little girl next to her who was already crying for some other reason and how after 45 minutes waiting for me, the coach in charge of parent pickup told the office staff that the kids were coming inside, then pointed at Camryn and said "But this one here, she's gonna need an adult with her" LOL
I assured Mason that I would never be late again, but that if for some unforseen reason I was, I'd give her twenty bucks.I think she's hoping I'll forget again next week. I told Cams I was sorry for being late, to which she gave me a snap said "I wanna see Ry-ry". Ahhh, to live in her world :)
I usually leave my house at 2:30 to get in the line. We live so close to the school it takes me no time at all to get there. This past week has been a rough one for various reasons, and I was feeling so rundown. Not wanting to be sick for the holiday weekend, I decided to take a nap before I got the girls. I bribed Natalie with a quarter to lay down with me and set my alarm for 2:20, giving me ten minutes to come out of my nap fog before I left for pickup. I left my phone on, but turned the ringer to beep/vibrate so it wouldn't wake Natalie. I of course would hear it, right? Well, no, apparently not. So I close my eyes at 1:30 and before I know it the alarm is screeching me awake. Wow time flies when you're napping! I was just getting ready to make some coffee when my phone beeped. It was the school. "Hello Mrs. Walker? This is Sawgrass Elementary, I called you a few minutes ago too. We still have your two daughters here." So I look at the stove clock which says 2:24 and say" Okaaaayyy, umm.." "It's early release day, did you forget?" "Oh my gosh!!! Oh my gosh! Yes, I totally forgot! I am soooo sorry!" I kept apologizing and "OMG"ing. " No problem, but your girls are a little upset, you want to talk to them?" Okay, so now as if I don't feel like a big enough loser, my daughter's in the front office of her new school thinking I have been in some horrible car accident or hopped a boat to Bermuda like I've threatened on numerous occasions. Mason is a worrywart by nature and she comes by it naturally,her nerves of jelly passed on courtesy of yours truly. So I could only imagine how many times she had twisted her shoelace around her fingers or how many hours of therapy were going to be needed after this incident. I told her how sorry I was and that I was on my way. Now the secretary had told me my "daughters" were upset. I knew Mason was and would expect nothing less, but Cams? I highly doubted it. I asked Mason if her sister was alright. "Oh yeah, she's fine. She did pinch a little Pre-K student, but she's just sitting here now." I knew it. The beauty of Cams's mind is that worry rarely finds it's way in. For all Cams knew, she and Mace were on a field trip to the office. She has no concept of time, only that there is never enough of it when it comes to the merry go round. And the fact that she doesn't know to worry like Mason is such a blessing for so many reasons, but in this particular situation such a blessing for Mace because I can only imagine the monstrocities the two of them could have conjured up about why I was late and what could have happened to me. And in a situation where the normal procedure would be for big sister to calm little sister, in these circumstances it was quite the opposite, with little Cams keeping Mason from hyperventilating about my tardiness.
As I pulled into the car circle, the principal walked the girls to my car. The principal! I was so embarrassed. I laughed it off and asked if this was where I was to pick up my Mother of the Year award? She laguhed and said not to worry, I was one of about ten other parents who had forgotten. I felt a slight bit better,until Mason chimed in with "Ten parents out of like 500 mom!" Ohhhhh, yeah, then I really am pathetic.
I made it up to them with cookie dough shakes from Steak and Shake and 6 times over "Thrill Hill" (only a St. Pete native knows what I'm talking about here).
Mason told me how the whole thing went down, how every car that pulled in she thought was me, how Cams pinched a little girl next to her who was already crying for some other reason and how after 45 minutes waiting for me, the coach in charge of parent pickup told the office staff that the kids were coming inside, then pointed at Camryn and said "But this one here, she's gonna need an adult with her" LOL
I assured Mason that I would never be late again, but that if for some unforseen reason I was, I'd give her twenty bucks.I think she's hoping I'll forget again next week. I told Cams I was sorry for being late, to which she gave me a snap said "I wanna see Ry-ry". Ahhh, to live in her world :)
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
They're Baaack!
The kids are back in school! Yay!!! I love my children dearly, but after spending ninety-something days in a row trying to entertain them I start to get a twitch in my eye, which clearly indicates my sanity and patience levels are dangerously low. So even though it felt like I had just closed my eyes when the alarm screeched us awake the first day back,not to mentiong it was pouring and we had to park out in a mud bog and hop-scotch muck puddles to get the kids to their classrooms, I was so happy to get them back at school no amount of rain could dampen my spirit.
Of course I still have Nat at home, but come next week she will be attending Pre-K for three hours a day and then world look out, because Mama hasn't had a free week-day morning in four years!!! I cannot wait!!
Mason was very nervous about the first day and understandably, as this is a brand new school for her, with no familiar faces in sight. I felt for her, because I had to start a new school in 8th grade and if I close me eyes and picture myself walking down those lonely hallways, my stomach still tenses up at the thought. But the thing about Mason is that although she tends to be shy at first, it doesn't take her long to warm up and each year I see her taking less time and less prompting to talk to new people. I have been working on this with her since she was a toddler, because if there one wish I have for her it is that she does not let fear hold her hostage,as it did me for so long. And Mace has an advantage over the other kids in her class because her teacher happens to be a friend and former co-worker of my mom's. And for the first day my mom, or "Gigo" as my girls call her, was at their school, helping kids find their way to their classrooms at the beginning of the day and to their parents car in the afternoon. For those of you who don't know, my mom works for the school system in the Title One division, which is why she was able to do this. My point is, Mason was nervous, which I took very seriously, but I made sure to point out how lucky she was that her grandmother was at the school and that was something most kids don't get to experience and that for all the knots in her stomach and fluttering of her heart, she was going to be just fine. And she was. Her teacher is awesome, her classroom is on the second floor, a stuffed Patrick from Spongebob sits in the reading corner and she saw a baby raccoon on the court at P.E. When you're nine, being impressed is easily achieved.
Now Cams, as usual, was another story. I tried as much as possible to prepare her for the first day. She has had so much change this summer that I can only imagine what she must be thinking. We moved to a new house, she went to camp over the summer with strange teachers and different "friends" and now I'm in her face talking about going to school tomorrow and seeing her teacher, to which she replied "Ms. Mills" (her teacher from the last two years) "No, not Ms. Mills. Ms. Lopez" I told her. To which she replied "See Ms Kimmy", her teacher from camp. "No,not Ms Kimmy, Ms Lopez. She's your new teacher at your new school." To which Cams replied "Mr.Bill, he wears a funny hat." Mr. Bill was her bus driver for the past several years and every Friday he would wear some crazy hat from his collection. We miss Mr. Bill. :( "No, not Mr. Bill. Ms Lopez, she's your new teacher. And Mrs.Tee, she's in your class too." I was trying, but it's just such a mystery what she's comprehending. "Are you excited about going to your new school?" I asked as I tucked her in. "Ry-ry. She eats wet food. She likes licky face." And that was Cams thoughts about her upcoming first day of school. So when Brad was putting her uniform on and I was fighting to braid her hair, the talk was of Riley and her "meat food". Well, at least she wasn't nervous. We dropped her off at her classroom first but because of the rain we were late and the class had already gone to P.E. so we took her by the hand and tried to find someone to point us in the right direction. Halfway down the hall we spotted Ms. Lopez. She walked up to Cams with her arms open wide. "There you are, I've been waiting for you Camryn" to which Cams gave her a snap and said "Ry-ry". And then Ms. Lopez took her by the hand, Brad and I gave her a hug and kiss, and our wishes for her to have a great first day and off they went, Cams and Ms Lopez. That was it! No crying, no hesitation, no "Who the heck is this lady holding my hand and walking me away from my parents?" Nope, Cams just went with it, as she normally does in these situations, which is both a blessing and a worry. I'm so thankful that she does not fear new people when it comes to times like these, as it is hard enough to send her somewhere new without really knowing what she understands about it and what she doesn't. I feel so guilty when I take her into a new school or camp and then have to leave her because I have no idea if she knows I'm coming back or if she's thinking "My mom finally gave me away. Guess I shouldn't have pulled Mason's hair this morning!" So the fact the she goes willingly spares me the heartbreak of leaving her screaming and crying. BUT, in other situations, like anywhere out in public, this carefree attitude towards strangers is really not such a good thing. The creepiest man in town with stringy hair, crooked,yellow teeth and soul-less eyes could walk up to Cams, offer her a lollipop and she'd take him by the hand talking about Ry-ry and Oobi and that scares the hell out of me! Which is something I hope she grows out of like tomorrow!
When I picked the kids up that afternoon, I spotted them sitting by the car circle, Mason cross-legged next to Cams with her hand up like Oobi, obviously trying to keep her sister amused. This year we decided to not put Cams on the bus, so her waiting in the car circle is a new thing and I was not feeling very confident that she would do well. Sitting Camryn in middle of a group of children can be a real gamble. Arms of every size and color, protected only by their shirts short sleeve, within reach of Camryns scratch happy fingers. And that's not all. Hair, hair everywhere, in ponytails, braids or worse ye,t free flowing, perfect for yanking and pulling. Lanky legs and pudgy calves, criss- crossed applesauce in every direction. Oh the pinching that could be done! I imagined pulling into the car circle only to see kids running towards me, screaming in utter horror, a look of fear on their little faces, and Cams pounding the pavement behind them saying "I wanna give them a hug! Make good choices people" ( A phrase she took from her Pre-K teacher).
But no, to my welcome surprise, there were my daughters sitting with the rest of the school, just like any other pair of sisters waiting for their mom. My heart melted. It was a sight I thought I'd never see. Cams was doing it. She was doing it!! For all practical purposes she looked just like any of the other kids out there. So much so that the P.E. coach, a young guy about 30 or so, came over to her and asked her name, to which Cams replied "Ry-ry". Mason quickly corrected her,telling the coach her name was Camryn. Apparently, he didn't clue in that Cams was not your typical car rider and went on to ask her if she knew which car was hers in the line, to which she again replied "Ry-ry". Love it!!! I guess he was starting to get the picture, because he turned to Mason and asked " Do you know her?" And Mason answered, "I would say so, she's my sister!" Those girls crack me up!! I was watching all this go down from my spot waaaaaaaaayyyyy back in the line and I was wondering what in the world this man was talking to Camryn about. I was actually laughing out loud in the car when I saw Cams give him her "I don't care what the question is my answer is Ry-ry" look. As I got further up in the line, Cams saw me and broke away from the holding area. It was then very obvious that Sawgrass Elementary doesn't know Cams yet, because the adults were telling her to wait for Mommy, stop running, blah, blah,blah. Cams barreled through the crowd, her Ne Hao Kai-Lan backpack swishing back and forth hitting whoever was in her path. Thank God the speed limit is 0 in the car line because she ran right out to my car and opened the door, coach five steps behind her. Mason had tried to hold her hand, but fifty one pounds of skin and bones can't really restrain sixty five pounds of pure determination. Cams piled in the backseat, Mason was trying to climb over her, which agitated Camryn so she scratched Mason, who started screaming which agitated Cam more so she scratched Mace again, which made Mason scream louder and hit Camryn, all the while the coach is trying to shut the door and get me out of there so the line can keep moving. But Camryns backpack is in the way of her seatbelt and I can't reach it, Mason won't get anywhere near Camryn at this point and who could blame her and the coach seems oblivious that he needs to buckle Camryn. I can see the teachers with their walkie talkies, no doubt muttering that some crazy woman and her crazy kids in a land yacht SUV are holding up the line. I finally just say "Thank you, she's fine" so I can get out of there and pull over in the parking lot to buckle Cams.
That night at the dinner table, Mace is going on and on and on about her first day. How cool her teacher is, how gross the boys are, what they will be working on this year, who her best friend is,etc. After about twenty minutes I say "Okay Mace,let's ask Cams about her day. Cams, how was your day at school?" "Ry-ry" she says. "No Cams, not Ry-ry. What did you do at school today?" "Ry-ry" she answers again. "Cams, what's your teachers name?" "Ry-ry" she says. "Cams,your teacher isn't Ry-ry, it's Ms Lopez. What did you put on your tray in the cafeteria?" To which she anwered...can you guess? "Ry-ry" Now I knew she knew her teachers name wasn't Ry-ry, she didn't learn about Ry-ry at school and she didn-t put Ry-ry on her tray in the cafeteria, although it very well could have been dog because you never know with school lunch, but the thing with Cams is she will tell you when she's ready and chances are when you ask, she won't be ready. This is something I know about my Cams. As I was tucking her in bed, I heard her whisper "Ryland did a good job and Trinity did a good job" I recognized those names from the giant laminated apple on her classroom door. Those were her classmates! "Yes Cams! Ryland did a good job and Trinity did a good job! Did Camryn do a good job?" She just giggled but I knew she knew I understood. She was telling me about her day the best she knew how. She didn't tell me what they sang in circle time or what she ate for lunch, but that's what notes home and monthly menus are for. That's how we communicate and although I wish it were more, it's so much more than I ever thought I'd get. She went to sleep and I got out her folder to sign her daily note. I added a comment on the bottom... "Sounds like Cams had a good day! I can't wait to hear about tomorrow!"
Of course I still have Nat at home, but come next week she will be attending Pre-K for three hours a day and then world look out, because Mama hasn't had a free week-day morning in four years!!! I cannot wait!!
Mason was very nervous about the first day and understandably, as this is a brand new school for her, with no familiar faces in sight. I felt for her, because I had to start a new school in 8th grade and if I close me eyes and picture myself walking down those lonely hallways, my stomach still tenses up at the thought. But the thing about Mason is that although she tends to be shy at first, it doesn't take her long to warm up and each year I see her taking less time and less prompting to talk to new people. I have been working on this with her since she was a toddler, because if there one wish I have for her it is that she does not let fear hold her hostage,as it did me for so long. And Mace has an advantage over the other kids in her class because her teacher happens to be a friend and former co-worker of my mom's. And for the first day my mom, or "Gigo" as my girls call her, was at their school, helping kids find their way to their classrooms at the beginning of the day and to their parents car in the afternoon. For those of you who don't know, my mom works for the school system in the Title One division, which is why she was able to do this. My point is, Mason was nervous, which I took very seriously, but I made sure to point out how lucky she was that her grandmother was at the school and that was something most kids don't get to experience and that for all the knots in her stomach and fluttering of her heart, she was going to be just fine. And she was. Her teacher is awesome, her classroom is on the second floor, a stuffed Patrick from Spongebob sits in the reading corner and she saw a baby raccoon on the court at P.E. When you're nine, being impressed is easily achieved.
Now Cams, as usual, was another story. I tried as much as possible to prepare her for the first day. She has had so much change this summer that I can only imagine what she must be thinking. We moved to a new house, she went to camp over the summer with strange teachers and different "friends" and now I'm in her face talking about going to school tomorrow and seeing her teacher, to which she replied "Ms. Mills" (her teacher from the last two years) "No, not Ms. Mills. Ms. Lopez" I told her. To which she replied "See Ms Kimmy", her teacher from camp. "No,not Ms Kimmy, Ms Lopez. She's your new teacher at your new school." To which Cams replied "Mr.Bill, he wears a funny hat." Mr. Bill was her bus driver for the past several years and every Friday he would wear some crazy hat from his collection. We miss Mr. Bill. :( "No, not Mr. Bill. Ms Lopez, she's your new teacher. And Mrs.Tee, she's in your class too." I was trying, but it's just such a mystery what she's comprehending. "Are you excited about going to your new school?" I asked as I tucked her in. "Ry-ry. She eats wet food. She likes licky face." And that was Cams thoughts about her upcoming first day of school. So when Brad was putting her uniform on and I was fighting to braid her hair, the talk was of Riley and her "meat food". Well, at least she wasn't nervous. We dropped her off at her classroom first but because of the rain we were late and the class had already gone to P.E. so we took her by the hand and tried to find someone to point us in the right direction. Halfway down the hall we spotted Ms. Lopez. She walked up to Cams with her arms open wide. "There you are, I've been waiting for you Camryn" to which Cams gave her a snap and said "Ry-ry". And then Ms. Lopez took her by the hand, Brad and I gave her a hug and kiss, and our wishes for her to have a great first day and off they went, Cams and Ms Lopez. That was it! No crying, no hesitation, no "Who the heck is this lady holding my hand and walking me away from my parents?" Nope, Cams just went with it, as she normally does in these situations, which is both a blessing and a worry. I'm so thankful that she does not fear new people when it comes to times like these, as it is hard enough to send her somewhere new without really knowing what she understands about it and what she doesn't. I feel so guilty when I take her into a new school or camp and then have to leave her because I have no idea if she knows I'm coming back or if she's thinking "My mom finally gave me away. Guess I shouldn't have pulled Mason's hair this morning!" So the fact the she goes willingly spares me the heartbreak of leaving her screaming and crying. BUT, in other situations, like anywhere out in public, this carefree attitude towards strangers is really not such a good thing. The creepiest man in town with stringy hair, crooked,yellow teeth and soul-less eyes could walk up to Cams, offer her a lollipop and she'd take him by the hand talking about Ry-ry and Oobi and that scares the hell out of me! Which is something I hope she grows out of like tomorrow!
When I picked the kids up that afternoon, I spotted them sitting by the car circle, Mason cross-legged next to Cams with her hand up like Oobi, obviously trying to keep her sister amused. This year we decided to not put Cams on the bus, so her waiting in the car circle is a new thing and I was not feeling very confident that she would do well. Sitting Camryn in middle of a group of children can be a real gamble. Arms of every size and color, protected only by their shirts short sleeve, within reach of Camryns scratch happy fingers. And that's not all. Hair, hair everywhere, in ponytails, braids or worse ye,t free flowing, perfect for yanking and pulling. Lanky legs and pudgy calves, criss- crossed applesauce in every direction. Oh the pinching that could be done! I imagined pulling into the car circle only to see kids running towards me, screaming in utter horror, a look of fear on their little faces, and Cams pounding the pavement behind them saying "I wanna give them a hug! Make good choices people" ( A phrase she took from her Pre-K teacher).
But no, to my welcome surprise, there were my daughters sitting with the rest of the school, just like any other pair of sisters waiting for their mom. My heart melted. It was a sight I thought I'd never see. Cams was doing it. She was doing it!! For all practical purposes she looked just like any of the other kids out there. So much so that the P.E. coach, a young guy about 30 or so, came over to her and asked her name, to which Cams replied "Ry-ry". Mason quickly corrected her,telling the coach her name was Camryn. Apparently, he didn't clue in that Cams was not your typical car rider and went on to ask her if she knew which car was hers in the line, to which she again replied "Ry-ry". Love it!!! I guess he was starting to get the picture, because he turned to Mason and asked " Do you know her?" And Mason answered, "I would say so, she's my sister!" Those girls crack me up!! I was watching all this go down from my spot waaaaaaaaayyyyy back in the line and I was wondering what in the world this man was talking to Camryn about. I was actually laughing out loud in the car when I saw Cams give him her "I don't care what the question is my answer is Ry-ry" look. As I got further up in the line, Cams saw me and broke away from the holding area. It was then very obvious that Sawgrass Elementary doesn't know Cams yet, because the adults were telling her to wait for Mommy, stop running, blah, blah,blah. Cams barreled through the crowd, her Ne Hao Kai-Lan backpack swishing back and forth hitting whoever was in her path. Thank God the speed limit is 0 in the car line because she ran right out to my car and opened the door, coach five steps behind her. Mason had tried to hold her hand, but fifty one pounds of skin and bones can't really restrain sixty five pounds of pure determination. Cams piled in the backseat, Mason was trying to climb over her, which agitated Camryn so she scratched Mason, who started screaming which agitated Cam more so she scratched Mace again, which made Mason scream louder and hit Camryn, all the while the coach is trying to shut the door and get me out of there so the line can keep moving. But Camryns backpack is in the way of her seatbelt and I can't reach it, Mason won't get anywhere near Camryn at this point and who could blame her and the coach seems oblivious that he needs to buckle Camryn. I can see the teachers with their walkie talkies, no doubt muttering that some crazy woman and her crazy kids in a land yacht SUV are holding up the line. I finally just say "Thank you, she's fine" so I can get out of there and pull over in the parking lot to buckle Cams.
That night at the dinner table, Mace is going on and on and on about her first day. How cool her teacher is, how gross the boys are, what they will be working on this year, who her best friend is,etc. After about twenty minutes I say "Okay Mace,let's ask Cams about her day. Cams, how was your day at school?" "Ry-ry" she says. "No Cams, not Ry-ry. What did you do at school today?" "Ry-ry" she answers again. "Cams, what's your teachers name?" "Ry-ry" she says. "Cams,your teacher isn't Ry-ry, it's Ms Lopez. What did you put on your tray in the cafeteria?" To which she anwered...can you guess? "Ry-ry" Now I knew she knew her teachers name wasn't Ry-ry, she didn't learn about Ry-ry at school and she didn-t put Ry-ry on her tray in the cafeteria, although it very well could have been dog because you never know with school lunch, but the thing with Cams is she will tell you when she's ready and chances are when you ask, she won't be ready. This is something I know about my Cams. As I was tucking her in bed, I heard her whisper "Ryland did a good job and Trinity did a good job" I recognized those names from the giant laminated apple on her classroom door. Those were her classmates! "Yes Cams! Ryland did a good job and Trinity did a good job! Did Camryn do a good job?" She just giggled but I knew she knew I understood. She was telling me about her day the best she knew how. She didn't tell me what they sang in circle time or what she ate for lunch, but that's what notes home and monthly menus are for. That's how we communicate and although I wish it were more, it's so much more than I ever thought I'd get. She went to sleep and I got out her folder to sign her daily note. I added a comment on the bottom... "Sounds like Cams had a good day! I can't wait to hear about tomorrow!"
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
So This is What It's Like ( Thanks for the title Anna) :)
I haven't blogged in several days and while there has been much to talk about, there has been much more to do, but I couldn't wait anymore so with Natalie just picked up by my Dad for swimming lessons and Mason amused in her room with a movie, my only distraction is Camryn in her room,screaming "I need help!"from behind her baby gate. And although her screams are enough to make my ears bleed at times, it's only one kid making noise, which in this house is considered peaceful.
So this past weekend Brad and I took an impromptu mini vacation with Mason and Natalie to Orlando. Camryn didn't come and before you label us as horrible, uncaring parents, let me tell you why.
It started last Wednesday when Brad said he was going to take Monday off and thought we could all go back to Busch Gardens again. For those of you who read my post about our last Busch Gardens trip, you probably will find no shock in my repsonse of "I'd rather poke my eyes out with sharp,pointy sticks!" Although the trip was classifed as a success as far as visiting a theme park with an Autistic seven year old, in the context of "I have a three day weekend, let's take Camryn to a theme park", it was a textbook crazy idea. And I so love my husband, because even in my total offense, he pointed out that yes, the last Busch Gardens excursion was rough, but we are a family, a family with an Autistic child and we need to do things together,even if at times it totally sucks. And I completely agree, which is why I went to Busch Gardens the last time. Did it, almost died, done for a very long time! I pointed out that while I admire him for wanting to include Camryn in all of our outings, that we also have two other kids who just might like to know how it feels to go on a trip without being scratched and bitten, and experience time with us where we can focus on just them and do what they want instead of what works best for Camryn. And oh yeah, without the horrified stares of several hundred people, you know, the way "normal"families do it.
Camryn had a fabulous summer, with horseback riding every Monday, swimming twice a week, sailing, bowling, bounce-housing, etc. so she certainly didn't miss out. And she was the only one of our girls who didn't get to spend alone time with "Nanny"(Brad's mom) over the summer because she had to go to camp. Camryn absolutely adores Nanny and "Papa Dave", so I knew she would be thrilled to spend a few days with them and they would be just as thrilled to have her. So, it was set, what started out as a day trip from hell to Busch Gardens turned into a 3 day, 2 night stay in Orlando with Brad, Mason, Natalie and of course me.
As soon as we decided, I was like a kid going to Disney for the first time. Being a Florida native with Disney in my own backyard, I've been there more times than I can count. I've even been there with Mason twice. I've also done Downtown Disney numerous times, and two of those were with Camryn, but the last time I took Mason she was much younger and Natalie was a baby. Plus, the last two times were the ones where I brought Camryn as well, so while it was fun, it was challenging to say the least and it left me feeling drained and completely sorry for myself. But now that Mason was nine and Natalie four, they were the perfect ages to go on a trip and a trip to Orlando, you can't get more magical than that! We have never gone on a family vacation just us. We've taken trips where my mom and other people came along, but never just us and the kids because it's always been too hard with Cams. Not that we couldn't do it, as I know people do, but more that I didn't want to, as horrible as that may sound. We did take her with us to North Carolina once, but we couldn't hike or go into stores and the restaurants we did go in definitely knew we were there. Our condo was on the third floor with a balcony, so you can imagine all the barricades we had to make out of furniture and suitcases so Camryn coudn't get to it. The room she and Mason shared had a freestanding dresser which called for Brad and I to get very creative in how were going to secure it and it also had a lamp attached to the wall, you notice I said "had". There was a heated pool at the complex so we drove thirty minutes to town to get Camryn a bathing suit with an innertube built in. She was in the pool no less than a minute before she bit the tube, the suit deflated and we were out of the water for the night. Never mind the fact that up until the last two months, she didn't sleep anywhere but her own bed, or sleep willfully I should say, so we brought the babygate with us to the condo,which caused major problems for Mason in the night when she had to use the bathroom. Can you say "Good Times!"
So, this my friends is why I was so excited to go on a vacation with my kids where I didn't have to worry about the neighbors in adjoining rooms waking up to screaming fits or worrying one of my brood would jump off the balcony.Not to mention, the freedom to roam amongst other families with young children and their tender skin, without the worry my child would draw blood or leave a bald spot. The freedom that you just don't think about if you don't have a child like Camryn. And what's funny is that, while one of the main reasons I write this blog is to educate those who have no idea what it is like, there were times on this trip that I found myself "lost" in the normality of it all,completely taking for granted that I was standing in an aviary at Gatorland surrounded by hundreds of lorakeets, my kids as well as myself covered in birds, with no thought that there may be a woman who couldn't bring her kid in because they would squeeze a bird to death in excitement. I sat with ease in the stands as we watched Shamu jump from the water, without the slightest worry the family behind me might have to leave early because their child couldn't sit through the show. And at Downtown Disney I walked, both hands swinging freely at my side, not even stopping to wonder if that woman in front of me with a death grip on her screaming son is doing so because he's a brat throwing a fit or if he's a child with Autism about to scratch a passerby. I had these moments, but I caught myself every time, as you can drive away from Autism but it is always on your mind. But I also had moments of "Oh my God, this is what it's like! This is what it's like to be a normal family!" Sure Mason and Natalie fought like cats and dogs, but that's normal.Natlie threw more than a few fits when she couldn't buy everything in the gift shop. But again, that's normal. And when Mason shouted out "This is the worst vacation ever!" when I scolded her for back talk, well that was just plain bratty, but also completely normal. It was something I had never experienced and while taking a trip with your kids is hardly a vacation, that is exactly what this was, a vacation from Autism. All the things that others may take for granted, I thanked God for under my breath. Waiting in line with little Natalie for the carousel. Taking a peaceful train ride through old Florida at Gatorland. Sitting on the sidelines while my girls splashed in the sprayground. All the things we would not have been able to do if Camryn was with us. All the things I wish I could do more of with my kids, all of them. But who's to say that I would have had such a great time, that I would have appreciated it so much if I didn't know what it's like on the other side. In fact I know I wouldn't have gotten so much joy out of having that time with Mason and Natalie and all their fighting and backtalk and gift shop fits if I didn't know the longing for it.
And when it was all over, and I pulled in my mother-in-laws drive and saw Camryns smiling face in the window I was so happy to see her. I walked in and she said " Give Momma a hug. Wanna see Ry-ry." She was sticky with pickle juice and smelled like Nicky, Nanny's dog that Camryn has her face shoved up on most of the day. As I bent down to give her a hug, Natalie walked past and Camryn pinched her. Natalie started screaming, Mason pushed Camryn , I scolded both of them. It was loud, it was chaotic, it was completely crazy. Basically it was our "normal" and it was going to make our next vacation so much sweeter!
So this past weekend Brad and I took an impromptu mini vacation with Mason and Natalie to Orlando. Camryn didn't come and before you label us as horrible, uncaring parents, let me tell you why.
It started last Wednesday when Brad said he was going to take Monday off and thought we could all go back to Busch Gardens again. For those of you who read my post about our last Busch Gardens trip, you probably will find no shock in my repsonse of "I'd rather poke my eyes out with sharp,pointy sticks!" Although the trip was classifed as a success as far as visiting a theme park with an Autistic seven year old, in the context of "I have a three day weekend, let's take Camryn to a theme park", it was a textbook crazy idea. And I so love my husband, because even in my total offense, he pointed out that yes, the last Busch Gardens excursion was rough, but we are a family, a family with an Autistic child and we need to do things together,even if at times it totally sucks. And I completely agree, which is why I went to Busch Gardens the last time. Did it, almost died, done for a very long time! I pointed out that while I admire him for wanting to include Camryn in all of our outings, that we also have two other kids who just might like to know how it feels to go on a trip without being scratched and bitten, and experience time with us where we can focus on just them and do what they want instead of what works best for Camryn. And oh yeah, without the horrified stares of several hundred people, you know, the way "normal"families do it.
Camryn had a fabulous summer, with horseback riding every Monday, swimming twice a week, sailing, bowling, bounce-housing, etc. so she certainly didn't miss out. And she was the only one of our girls who didn't get to spend alone time with "Nanny"(Brad's mom) over the summer because she had to go to camp. Camryn absolutely adores Nanny and "Papa Dave", so I knew she would be thrilled to spend a few days with them and they would be just as thrilled to have her. So, it was set, what started out as a day trip from hell to Busch Gardens turned into a 3 day, 2 night stay in Orlando with Brad, Mason, Natalie and of course me.
As soon as we decided, I was like a kid going to Disney for the first time. Being a Florida native with Disney in my own backyard, I've been there more times than I can count. I've even been there with Mason twice. I've also done Downtown Disney numerous times, and two of those were with Camryn, but the last time I took Mason she was much younger and Natalie was a baby. Plus, the last two times were the ones where I brought Camryn as well, so while it was fun, it was challenging to say the least and it left me feeling drained and completely sorry for myself. But now that Mason was nine and Natalie four, they were the perfect ages to go on a trip and a trip to Orlando, you can't get more magical than that! We have never gone on a family vacation just us. We've taken trips where my mom and other people came along, but never just us and the kids because it's always been too hard with Cams. Not that we couldn't do it, as I know people do, but more that I didn't want to, as horrible as that may sound. We did take her with us to North Carolina once, but we couldn't hike or go into stores and the restaurants we did go in definitely knew we were there. Our condo was on the third floor with a balcony, so you can imagine all the barricades we had to make out of furniture and suitcases so Camryn coudn't get to it. The room she and Mason shared had a freestanding dresser which called for Brad and I to get very creative in how were going to secure it and it also had a lamp attached to the wall, you notice I said "had". There was a heated pool at the complex so we drove thirty minutes to town to get Camryn a bathing suit with an innertube built in. She was in the pool no less than a minute before she bit the tube, the suit deflated and we were out of the water for the night. Never mind the fact that up until the last two months, she didn't sleep anywhere but her own bed, or sleep willfully I should say, so we brought the babygate with us to the condo,which caused major problems for Mason in the night when she had to use the bathroom. Can you say "Good Times!"
So, this my friends is why I was so excited to go on a vacation with my kids where I didn't have to worry about the neighbors in adjoining rooms waking up to screaming fits or worrying one of my brood would jump off the balcony.Not to mention, the freedom to roam amongst other families with young children and their tender skin, without the worry my child would draw blood or leave a bald spot. The freedom that you just don't think about if you don't have a child like Camryn. And what's funny is that, while one of the main reasons I write this blog is to educate those who have no idea what it is like, there were times on this trip that I found myself "lost" in the normality of it all,completely taking for granted that I was standing in an aviary at Gatorland surrounded by hundreds of lorakeets, my kids as well as myself covered in birds, with no thought that there may be a woman who couldn't bring her kid in because they would squeeze a bird to death in excitement. I sat with ease in the stands as we watched Shamu jump from the water, without the slightest worry the family behind me might have to leave early because their child couldn't sit through the show. And at Downtown Disney I walked, both hands swinging freely at my side, not even stopping to wonder if that woman in front of me with a death grip on her screaming son is doing so because he's a brat throwing a fit or if he's a child with Autism about to scratch a passerby. I had these moments, but I caught myself every time, as you can drive away from Autism but it is always on your mind. But I also had moments of "Oh my God, this is what it's like! This is what it's like to be a normal family!" Sure Mason and Natalie fought like cats and dogs, but that's normal.Natlie threw more than a few fits when she couldn't buy everything in the gift shop. But again, that's normal. And when Mason shouted out "This is the worst vacation ever!" when I scolded her for back talk, well that was just plain bratty, but also completely normal. It was something I had never experienced and while taking a trip with your kids is hardly a vacation, that is exactly what this was, a vacation from Autism. All the things that others may take for granted, I thanked God for under my breath. Waiting in line with little Natalie for the carousel. Taking a peaceful train ride through old Florida at Gatorland. Sitting on the sidelines while my girls splashed in the sprayground. All the things we would not have been able to do if Camryn was with us. All the things I wish I could do more of with my kids, all of them. But who's to say that I would have had such a great time, that I would have appreciated it so much if I didn't know what it's like on the other side. In fact I know I wouldn't have gotten so much joy out of having that time with Mason and Natalie and all their fighting and backtalk and gift shop fits if I didn't know the longing for it.
And when it was all over, and I pulled in my mother-in-laws drive and saw Camryns smiling face in the window I was so happy to see her. I walked in and she said " Give Momma a hug. Wanna see Ry-ry." She was sticky with pickle juice and smelled like Nicky, Nanny's dog that Camryn has her face shoved up on most of the day. As I bent down to give her a hug, Natalie walked past and Camryn pinched her. Natalie started screaming, Mason pushed Camryn , I scolded both of them. It was loud, it was chaotic, it was completely crazy. Basically it was our "normal" and it was going to make our next vacation so much sweeter!
Friday, July 30, 2010
Walking to a Different Beat
Before Camryn started at Discovery Learning Center, I had enrolled Mason in a Pre-K program at the same elementary school I attended and worked at. In fact, she was one of the regular ed kids in the reverse mainstream program that I worked in years earlier. Funny huh? Her class day was from 7:30-1:30 and Camryns was 8:00-2:00. It worked out beautifully as far as drop off and pick up as they were within a mile of each other. And while I had mixed emotions about putting Camryn somewhere so young, I have to be honest and say that more of me wanted her to go than not. She needed the social interaction and one on one time with the therapists and I needed social interaction of my own, as well as some one on one time with myself, although I definitely could have benefitted from therapy as well.
At that point in my life I was like any other young mother with a pre-schooler and a toddler who stayed at home with their kids. Brad's work schedule was crazy and he was often gone from sunup till sundown, as well as most weekends. Home alone with the kids all day left me starving for adult interaction and dealing with Camryns issues on a daily basis was enough to make me put my head in a pillow and scream out my frustrations. I had Mason in school so she could make friends and learn independence, but also get a break from the constant focus on her sister. Before Camryn was born, Mason was the center of our world. The only child, only grandchild, smart as a whip and a wide eyed beauty. She was the golden child, attracting attention everywhere we went,positive attention that is,not the "why is your kid screaming and biting themselves" kind. When Cam was born, there was the usual shift in attention from older child to newborn, which Mason handled like a pro. When Camryn started showing signs of trouble, it felt like everything became about Camryn, because it did. Don't get me wrong, Mason was neglected by no means, but it became everybody else doing things with her instead of me because I was either taking her sister for a good neck stretch or hunting down some witch doctor in hopes he had some sort of potion or powder to fix my child. I was always at Masons school functions and read her stories at night, but as far as movies and Chuck E. Cheese's,that was courtesy of my brother and his girlfriend, my parents, and let's not forget Anna.
I put Camryn in school for very obvious reasons, but also because I feared that if I didn't have some sort of break or reprieve from this child I couldn't soothe or understand, that I would be on the front page of the local paper," Woman Loses it and Takes Up Residence in a Very Tall Tree." Like any mom, I needed a break, but not just from my kids. I needed time to think about something other than doctors, and syndromes and P.A.R.C. So everyday, after I kissed my babies goodbye for six hours, I parked my car at Coffee Pot Bayou and I walked. And I walked and walked and walked. Five miles everyday, following the bay as it wound through Old Northeast and the downtown waterfront. It was so freeing, no stroller to push,no sippy cups weighing me down, no rearranging toys to the left of the stroller. It was just me and the sun on my shoulders and I think I would have broken without it. Those walks kept me sane, kept me positive, kept me going. I have always been a walker, (funny that's my married name now) and with Mason I kept it up because she was such an easy baby. I'd plop her in the stroller and she'd ride till I was done. I think you already know that with Camryn it wasn't so easy. When she was very young, about two months, I remember trying to walk with the double stroller, Mason up front and Cams laying down in the back. Mace was fine, checking out the scenery, but Cams would scream and cry. At first I would ignore it, hoping she'd quiet down. But she was unrelentless, and of course she wouldn't take a pacifier like her supereasy sister had. It would turn out me walking five steps then stopping to soothe Camryn, five steps more, soothing again until finally I was like "Screw it!" and I bought a workout video which I did in my living room while the kids watched. It wasn't the same....at all.
The past year and a half had turned my life upside down and my mental stability was hanging on by a very tattered thread. With Brad working all the time and none of my other friends with babies having any clue what it was like to have a baby like Cam, I felt isolated and very alone. I never let on though, because at the time, I was still pretty shy and softspoken. Cams had only begun my transformation. I felt like I shouldn't complain, except to Brad, my mom and Anna, as those were the closest people to me and I knew they would understand. But to the rest of the world I showed a solid grin. Mace is fine,Brad is fine,I'm fine, Cam is fine. Still waiting for that Oscar.
I think it was the same week Camryn started school that she also started walking. It was a day I thought would never come. Mason walked the day she turned one. Some of my friends kids started at ten months. I guess Cam thought "I'll be walking the rest of my life. I'm gonna milk this carrying gig as long as I can." Up until this point she would crawl and scoot everywhere, as well as hitch a ride on my hip. When I would try to put her down and have her stand and put pressure on her feet she would go all jelly legs on me and lift her legs up.Mason would pull this stunt too when she was throwing a temper tantrum and I wanted her to walk. But Camryn would do it every time I tried to get her to stand. About a month before she started walking, I took her to the neurologist at All Childrens for an evaluation. Even though we'd already been to a neurosurgeon, I wanted to cover all our bases and be seen by anybody with a "Neuro" in their title. This particular neurologist came with high accolades and I was sure he would have an answer for Camryns mysterious ailment. After he examined her, read over her records and listened to my recount of her life so far, he left the room and came back with a copy of an article on "Sitting on Air Syndrome". Huh? I had told him about Camryns refusal to stand on her own,and I guess this "Sitting on Air" thing was the best he could come up with, even though it could explain NONE of her other delays. Basically the article talked about how researchers have found a small group of children who would lift their legs in the air when they were put down to stand. According to them, it was unexplainable but harmless and would eventaully correct itself. That's what I left his office with. A bad copy of "Sitting on Air Syndrome" and a bill for our copay. I would have rather he just said "I got nothing."
When she did finally take her first step I shouted with joy and I know my back threw a party. Yes! She did it, she's moving forward! So she's six months later than the books said she should be. She has torticollis, the therapist said this would happen. She'd be delayed at first, but eventually she would catch up and she was starting!! I was eager to see what skill she'd master next. Talking would be very nice. Maybe an interest in coloring? How about mimicking or playing with toys or ANYTHING NORMAL KIDS DO!
I waited for her to catch up, and eventually she was doing almost everything a typical two year old should be doing, only problem being by that time she was six.
At that point in my life I was like any other young mother with a pre-schooler and a toddler who stayed at home with their kids. Brad's work schedule was crazy and he was often gone from sunup till sundown, as well as most weekends. Home alone with the kids all day left me starving for adult interaction and dealing with Camryns issues on a daily basis was enough to make me put my head in a pillow and scream out my frustrations. I had Mason in school so she could make friends and learn independence, but also get a break from the constant focus on her sister. Before Camryn was born, Mason was the center of our world. The only child, only grandchild, smart as a whip and a wide eyed beauty. She was the golden child, attracting attention everywhere we went,positive attention that is,not the "why is your kid screaming and biting themselves" kind. When Cam was born, there was the usual shift in attention from older child to newborn, which Mason handled like a pro. When Camryn started showing signs of trouble, it felt like everything became about Camryn, because it did. Don't get me wrong, Mason was neglected by no means, but it became everybody else doing things with her instead of me because I was either taking her sister for a good neck stretch or hunting down some witch doctor in hopes he had some sort of potion or powder to fix my child. I was always at Masons school functions and read her stories at night, but as far as movies and Chuck E. Cheese's,that was courtesy of my brother and his girlfriend, my parents, and let's not forget Anna.
I put Camryn in school for very obvious reasons, but also because I feared that if I didn't have some sort of break or reprieve from this child I couldn't soothe or understand, that I would be on the front page of the local paper," Woman Loses it and Takes Up Residence in a Very Tall Tree." Like any mom, I needed a break, but not just from my kids. I needed time to think about something other than doctors, and syndromes and P.A.R.C. So everyday, after I kissed my babies goodbye for six hours, I parked my car at Coffee Pot Bayou and I walked. And I walked and walked and walked. Five miles everyday, following the bay as it wound through Old Northeast and the downtown waterfront. It was so freeing, no stroller to push,no sippy cups weighing me down, no rearranging toys to the left of the stroller. It was just me and the sun on my shoulders and I think I would have broken without it. Those walks kept me sane, kept me positive, kept me going. I have always been a walker, (funny that's my married name now) and with Mason I kept it up because she was such an easy baby. I'd plop her in the stroller and she'd ride till I was done. I think you already know that with Camryn it wasn't so easy. When she was very young, about two months, I remember trying to walk with the double stroller, Mason up front and Cams laying down in the back. Mace was fine, checking out the scenery, but Cams would scream and cry. At first I would ignore it, hoping she'd quiet down. But she was unrelentless, and of course she wouldn't take a pacifier like her supereasy sister had. It would turn out me walking five steps then stopping to soothe Camryn, five steps more, soothing again until finally I was like "Screw it!" and I bought a workout video which I did in my living room while the kids watched. It wasn't the same....at all.
The past year and a half had turned my life upside down and my mental stability was hanging on by a very tattered thread. With Brad working all the time and none of my other friends with babies having any clue what it was like to have a baby like Cam, I felt isolated and very alone. I never let on though, because at the time, I was still pretty shy and softspoken. Cams had only begun my transformation. I felt like I shouldn't complain, except to Brad, my mom and Anna, as those were the closest people to me and I knew they would understand. But to the rest of the world I showed a solid grin. Mace is fine,Brad is fine,I'm fine, Cam is fine. Still waiting for that Oscar.
I think it was the same week Camryn started school that she also started walking. It was a day I thought would never come. Mason walked the day she turned one. Some of my friends kids started at ten months. I guess Cam thought "I'll be walking the rest of my life. I'm gonna milk this carrying gig as long as I can." Up until this point she would crawl and scoot everywhere, as well as hitch a ride on my hip. When I would try to put her down and have her stand and put pressure on her feet she would go all jelly legs on me and lift her legs up.Mason would pull this stunt too when she was throwing a temper tantrum and I wanted her to walk. But Camryn would do it every time I tried to get her to stand. About a month before she started walking, I took her to the neurologist at All Childrens for an evaluation. Even though we'd already been to a neurosurgeon, I wanted to cover all our bases and be seen by anybody with a "Neuro" in their title. This particular neurologist came with high accolades and I was sure he would have an answer for Camryns mysterious ailment. After he examined her, read over her records and listened to my recount of her life so far, he left the room and came back with a copy of an article on "Sitting on Air Syndrome". Huh? I had told him about Camryns refusal to stand on her own,and I guess this "Sitting on Air" thing was the best he could come up with, even though it could explain NONE of her other delays. Basically the article talked about how researchers have found a small group of children who would lift their legs in the air when they were put down to stand. According to them, it was unexplainable but harmless and would eventaully correct itself. That's what I left his office with. A bad copy of "Sitting on Air Syndrome" and a bill for our copay. I would have rather he just said "I got nothing."
When she did finally take her first step I shouted with joy and I know my back threw a party. Yes! She did it, she's moving forward! So she's six months later than the books said she should be. She has torticollis, the therapist said this would happen. She'd be delayed at first, but eventually she would catch up and she was starting!! I was eager to see what skill she'd master next. Talking would be very nice. Maybe an interest in coloring? How about mimicking or playing with toys or ANYTHING NORMAL KIDS DO!
I waited for her to catch up, and eventually she was doing almost everything a typical two year old should be doing, only problem being by that time she was six.
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