Lost in Translation

I have never thought of myself as bilingual and that is a bit embarrassing, considering I took seven years of Spanish in school and all I can really say is "Hola, me llamo es Pedro", which clearly it's not. But the other day as I was listening to Camryn speak and found myself responding to really strange requests, I realized, I am totally bilingual, I speak Autism!
Because Camryn has a hard time putting words together correctly and prounounces things in her own dialect, many of the common words you and I would use come out a tad bit different. My favorite example is gum, one of Camryns all time fave things to chew on. While a stick or two would last most of us about twenty minutes or so, Camryn likes to change hers out every thirty seconds. It has only been in the past two years that I let her chew gum because I was worried she wouldn't understand that it's not something to be swallowed, so at six years old I gave her her very first stick of peppermint gum. Here's the funny part....when Camryn heard "gum" and the word "peppermint" used in the same sentence she put them together to make the word....are you ready.....government!! LOL So when she wants gum she says "I want some goverment". And when she's done with it and places the slimy wrinkled rubber in my hand she says "More "goverment" please"! And here's the best, when we are out and I give her gum she will shout "I love "goverment!" It is hilarious!!! At a time where people are really not all that thrilled with our country's leadership, they must really be wondering why our child is so gung ho about it!
Another of Camryn's phrases that cracks me up has to do with pretzels. Not just any pretzles, but pretzles coated in salt. The girl can eat some salt and a word of warning, do NOT eat pretzles or tortilla chips that Camryn has had access to because you will find yourself biting into a damp, soggy, and saltless snack. She likes to keep her loved ones sodium levels down! Any how, she associates pretzles with salt and has also put these two together. Whenever she wants a bag she will say " I want some "problem solved" and I know right away that she is talking about pretzles! And when we are at the grocery store and pass by the chip aisle she will shout out "I like "problem solved!". Again stares from the crowd and laughter from me.
This next one is a bit gross. When Camryn has to poop, she will go in the bathroom and say "Squeeze the meat out!" I have NO idea where this one came from and you can imagine the looks I get in public restrooms. Enough said...moving on.
Cams has accompanied me to the deli enough to know that I always order a pound of sliced turkey, and turkey is one of her favorite snacks. At home, she will go to the refrigerator, pull open the deli drawer and say "Turkey pound please". She signs the word more with her hands and keeps saying "Turkey pound. Turkey pound please!" When I give it to her she will answer "Thank you. I love the way you're sitting"! LOL She gets that from school I guess...cracks me up!!
A few weeks ago my mom and I were on a walk by the bay and we had Camryn in the stroller. There were several ducks in the water and I pointed to them and asked Cam what they were. "Look at the mother quack" she responded and my mom and I burst out laughing. In her eyes one of them was the mom and ducks quack, so there you go!
When I get Cam out of the bath she says "Paper towel please" which means she wants a towel. She refers to all music as "Michael Buble" and when I turn the radio down in the car she signs more and says "More Michael Buble please". When she puts her hand in the dog's mouth and get's her fingers wet, she finds me wherever I may be, wipes her hands on me and say "Eewwwww, teeth poop" and I don't miss a beat as I know exactly what that means. "Do you need wipes honey" translates into "I pooped!" and "My motrin hurts" means something is hurting on her! Smart girl, she knows I give her Motrin when she is sick. Anything that squirts from a bottle, whether it's shampoo or ketchup is "lotion" to Camryn and it goes everywhere lotion would go which can get really messy! When getting her ready for bed she says "Do you need a strawberry pull-up baby?" which means she wants me to put a pull-up on her. Not sure where the strawberry came from, but there must be a reason. "Cube-cubes" are kisses she gives to dogs,"licky-face" are kisses dogs give to her and "Ry-Ry" is every dog that she sees.
When over at my moms a few weeks ago, Camryn and I went next door to visit my mom's neighbor and good friend. Camryn knows her name is "Dale" but when she opened the door to greet us Camryn bit her hand in excitment and said "Hi next door!!" Dale and I cracked up and now Dale has a new nickname!
The list goes on and on and each one is cuter than the rest. You don't realize when it's an everyday thing how unique it is until you sit back and really think about. Each one of her sayings is a product of how she put the meaning and pronunciation of the words together in her brain. Obviously she is hearing what everything is,just how her brain translates it is so interesting. One thing that is understood by all is that Camryn brings so much joy and laughter to our life. You never know what you are going to get from one day to the next and that keeps it interesting. Who knows, maybe she has all the answers. Maybe all Congress needs to fix it's mess is a pack of gum and some pretzles. Government problem solved! Who knew it was that easy!