Okay so after my little rant the other day I am feeling better. Still frustrated with the current situation and behaviors, but moving forward with answered prayers of strength to face another day of screams and aggression. And my poor little Cammy......if it wasn't bad enough that she was stung by yellowjackets last month and then broke out in itchy welts on her body, this past Tuesday she came home from school with some seriously red cheeks and chin. I took her to the doctor and was told she had Fifth's disease, which is not nearly as horrendous as it sounds. It is a mild virus and by the time the rash presents, the virus has passed. It is only a serious threat to pregnant women and people with compromised immune systems. I was told to give her Benadryl and by the weekend it should be gone. Well, as of this morning, it was still there and not only is it red, but now her skin is scaly and her chin looks swollen. I'm not sure if this is a result of all the ithching she has been doing or if something else if going on. She is constanly scratching at it and when I ask her if she's itchy takes my hand and places it on her face as she whimpers. It breaks my heart.
Summer is approaching like a bullet train and I am trying my hardest to break my chronic procrastination habits and get a plan in place before the first of 78, thirteen hour days that need to be filled down to the minute. And first things first was a trip to the YMCA to sign Miss Cam up for Camp COAST. Last year we did all seven weeks of camp because summer school, or Extended School Year,as it is now referred to in the upmost political correcness, was not an option since we had just moved back to this county. This year I was planning on doing just three weeks of camp and then the four weeks of ESY, thinking our wallet would fare so much better. But the thing about summer school is, frankly it's a tease. It runs from 8:30 to noon. I totally appreciate the break, really I do, but what do we do from 12:01 to 7:30? With Mace and Nat, the list is endless....go to the movies, the beach, the playground, the mall, nature park, paint your own pottery, stay home and play, etc. But Cammy don't play that...any of it. I heard about an after care program that was being held at the summer school site exclusively for Autistic children. I emailed the coordinator regarding the price and to my surprise was informed that it was $15.00 an hour, four hours a day and a MINIMUM of four weeks of care was required. Sixty bucks a day? Ummmm, we'll pass. I was so bummed because I really wanted Cams to go to summer school for the consistency as her current classmates and classroom assistant, who I adore, will be there. But with the short hours, it is a real strain on my other two and their summer plans. I know it probably sounds like I am trying to get rid of Cams during the day and if I was to be perfectly honest, I am. But not because I don't love her or want her to be part of the family. It's because I do love her, as well as Mason and Natalie and I have to take everybody's wants and needs into concern when I make these decisions and as far as summer goes, Camryn gets nothing out of staying home with us except for a constant chanting of "No!" and extreme frustration. I would love nothing more than to be able to wake up on a sunny summer morning, tell all three of my girlies to put on their swimsuits, grab their flip flops and hop in the car 'cause we're spending the day at the beach. I would pack us some PB&J's, bottled water, some grapes, bring a beach chair, some sand toys and watch my kids build sandcastles and splash in the surf the way I did as a child. And for the past eight summers I have tried that, always in vain. Although Cam loves the water and digging in the sand, the beach just doesn't work for her right now. She needs constant supervision and will take off and attack a nearby child in a heartbeat. God forbid another family has the same idea we do and sits within a ten foot radius of us, exposing colorful buckets and shovels to Cam. She has no concept of asking, and so she goes over and grabs whatever looks cool, destroying castles in the making and pinching anyone in her way. It's really not a great way to make friends at the beach. She will go into the water without any concern that it could abduct her with it's current or fill her lungs in seconds. I have to watch her like a hawk, which means nobody is watching my other two. Out of the water she only likes to sit on the sand for a brief while before she stands up and starts shouting and signing "Done! All done!" She then proceeds to strip herself of bathing suit and swim diaper, not liking the way wet clothes feel on her skin. A whole twenty minutes have passed and I haven't sat down once, the kids haven't even finished the castles mote and Cam is over it. Yeah, really rather not do that this year.
So, instead of summer school I decided to put Cams in camp all seven weeks again this year. If it wasn't so expensive there would never be any question....going all summer would be a given. And really, saying it's expensive is a joke because it comes out to less than five dollars an hour.I mean, where are you gonna find that? But when you add it all up it is over a thousand dollars for the whole experience, but really, it is sooooo worth the money. They are going sailing again this year, doing the horseback riding every week, swimming lessons, and going to Big Cat Rescue, which I know it totally going to put Camryn in freak out mode as you all know her adoration for "White Tiger" and "Ba-cheetah's". She is going to have the time of her life and that is worth every penny. It's just a shame though that there aren't more camps like these available with funding provided by the government. It really puts a dent in your wallet and then if you have typical kids who want to do a camp, forget about it! Thank goodness my Dad is very generous and helps with the expense. And my mom always lets Mason pick a camp each summer that she will pay for. Because Mason has a love of animals, I signed her up at the zoo to take a weeklong "Junior Zookeeper" camp, which I think she will really enjoy. She will also take one week of "Rocketry" at the Science Center and one week with Natalie in puppetry at "American Stage". Other than that, I don't like to tie up the summer because after all summer is supposed to be lazy and carefree. All of my friends with school-aged children talk about how they love summer because of the absence of schedules and freedom to have fun. Whereas I cringe at the thought of having to entertain Camryn from sunup to sundown when nothing holds her attention more than twenty seconds. Mace and Nat? I am thrilled about summertime with them. I want to them to have the summers I had as a kid. Sleeping in, beach,pool,movies, friends over, etc. It is just so damn hard to make it happen with Autism always trying to steal the show.
I am hoping for a good summer. Thank God for Camp COAST and all the amazing people who make it happen. It is a blessing for us and so many other families and I hope one day it's not a novelty, but the norm. I hope that come August 22nd, (the day school starts back, not that I am counting days or anything) that we can all look back on this summer as our best one yet. That means less screaming fits, fewer battle scars and maybe even, dare I say, no poopy panties. So here's to the sweet smell of sunscreen, handstands in the pool and terrific exhaustion at the end of the day. And to castle's of sand that stay standing, at least until the end of summer.
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